This month we are celebrating our failures because we believe them to be a very important and valuable part of each and every journey we travel. Today I would like to highlight some of the mom fails I have experienced
When you're a mom their is no off switch, no pause button. You are a mom 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 12 months a year for life. It's a time consuming incredibly demanding job. Where everyone is quick to criticize and offer their opinion. There are few thank yous, the hugs of undoubtable love disappear over night, and the feeling of being taken for granted starts to loam. We all strive to be perfect, I know for decades I continually strived to be the best mom out there. However no matter how hard you try or how picture perfect your life is. Perfection is not real. You are bound to mess up and that's okay.
All of my children have grown to be great and wonderful individuals. Although their journey to becoming these amazing people was one filled with countless mom fails on my account. While yes a fail is a fail, I like to think each fail helped to shape not only them, but myself as well. Making my family a group of unique and special individuals that were crafted by the lessons learned from each fail.
Every fail wasn't this big catastrophic event for myself of the children. Some fails were small and in passing. There are some fails that I remember, but the children do not. There are also some fails that they remember and I do not. When they share them with me the only thought that goes through my head is, "Damn, why didn't I remember that. It obviously left an impact on them. Here's yet another fail for me". I find that those are the fails that loam over my heart the most. I love who my children and and without that fail they might be entirely different people, but as a mom I still do wish that I could have been a little more perfect in that moment for them.
I can look back on fails and wish for better or feel a little sting from my misstep. Although I can remember there were stretches of time where I actually felt like a complete failure of a mom. I find that I wasn't failing because of anything I was doing. Rather the fail was in trying too excessively to be a perfect mom. I was unable to relax and enjoy the simple moments with my children while they were small. This is a regret, but a great reminder to not pay too much attention to the idea of perfection because fails are going to happen either way. So why not enjoy life and fail rather than stress and fail.
I believe out of all of the mom fails I encountered over the years. My biggest mom fail however was the pressure I was placing on myself to be the perfect mom, was my biggest failure. Being a mom is magical, its scary and its hard as hell to have your whole heart walking around the world without you close enough to protect them. It's something I'm still working on. Yet, I have began to forgive myself, to heal, to enjoy our moments, to laugh more, and to enjoy our lives with just as much passion and focus as I used to use when it came to my fails.
Here is my take away for the day;
1. You're doing fantastic!
2. Allow yourself to step back to see your world
and your children for who they are.
3. Let go of perfect, being you is all the kids need.
Thavin & Marcob is a place where you are celebrated for being you!